Atelophobia (from the Greek: ατελής, atelès, “imperfect, incomplete” “fear”) is the fear of not being good enough or imperfection.

Oh great, another affliction.  That’s all I need.  So now what?  First, stop defining yourself by your story.  You are not your story – you are the AWE-SOME-NESS underneath your “rubble,” I meant story, my bad.  Shit, do we ever have a happy story? Or is our story just piles and piles of temporal suffering? I think we all have happy stories somehere within, but I think most of us tend to identify with the story that keeps us being victims (whether we are aware of it or not) – another way of saying it – our ego thrives on suffering, so since most of us believe we are our ego (false sense of self) we identify with the things that will keep the ego alive.

In “The Power Of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, he states, Death is a stripping away of all that is not you. The secret of life is to “die before you die” — and find that there is no death.

So what does it mean to “Die before you die?”  It means to die to your past, your story, your ego. Once the ego has been put to rest (so to speak) you can finally now live true to your essence – the reality of who you really are.  Why die?  Our ego is a living thing, an entitiy that lives within you which has its own feelings and life force.  When you are faced with overcoming your ego, it is probably the hardest challenge you will ever face and the ego will do whatever it has to do to survive – and this fight, at times, will feel like a death.

So, how do we overcome it?  If I was any good at it I would have a book not a blog, so that’s that. Nonetheless, from my readings,  most spiritual adivisors would tell you to ‘bring awareness’ to the thing that is conflicting you, challenging your essence or better yet, charging your ego.  How do you know if it is being charged or irritated?  Here you go:  Have you ever believed in something so much that you believe it is who you are at your core?  A good example is politics.  Politics has a way of causing so much divisiveness because in politics, there is always someone who has to be right, while logically making the other wrong (I mean they even call it “on the other side of the aisle” – blatant division).   Have you ever overheard a political conversation that “makes your blood boil” so much that you can feel it in your gut.  You begin to shake, sweat and feel the deep need to “set that idiot straight!” because you know best, right?  That’s your ego working.  It is striving to defend itself or control you because you have identified yourself with your false self – If you are your ego – what do you tell yourself in this case?  I am my pollitics.  I am my beliefs.  If you disagree with any of them, you disagree with me and that threatens my core, how dare you?  I can’t be your friend, we have nothing in common.  You are wrong!

Back to overcoming it.  Bring awareness to those feelings when you feel your ego being awakened.  I am not going to regurgitate how to do it  because I am still working on it myself – moment to moment – For more information you should read, The Power of Now then A New Earth or The Untethered Soul.

In the meantime, ask yourself this question:

Who’s in control, “you” or your ego?

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